Running On Empty Read online

  RUNNING ON EMPTY

  COLETTE BALLARD

  Tulip Teen

  Copyright © 2013 by Colette Ballard

  Sale of the paperback edition of this book without its cover is unauthorized.

  Spencer Hill Press

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.

  All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever. Contact: Tulip Romance an imprint of Spencer Hill Press, PO

  Box 247, Contoocook, NH 03229, USA

  Please visit our website at www.tulipromance.com

  First Edition: November 2013.

  Colette Ballard

  Running on Empty: a novel / by Colette Ballard – 1st ed.

  p. cm.

  Summary:

  A seventeen-year-old girl is brutally attacked by her controlling boyfriend. She accidentally kills him in self-defense and, with the help of her closest friends, eludes police until she can find evidence to clear her name and the time to face the boy who has stood by her for years and who she has loved for as long as she can remember.

  The authors acknowledge the copyrighted or trademarked status and trademark owners of the following word marks mentioned in this fiction:

  Bambie, Barbie, Biography Channel, Brillo, Camaro (Chevrolet Camaro), Chap Stick, Cheerios, Chucks (Chuck Taylor), Cocoa Puffs, Coke (Coca-Cola), Cuervo, Dallas Cowboys, Dollar General, Dukes of Hazard, Elijah Craig, Facebook, Fashion Fairy Barbie, Flintstones, French’s, Girl Scout cookies, Google, Hallmark, Incredible Hulk, Irish Spring, Kryptonite, Lysol, Maker’s Mark, Mane n’ Tail conditioner, Marlboro Lights, Mustang, Napoleon Dynamite, Old Milwaukee’s Best, Polaroid, Pumbaa/Lion King, Ralph Lauren, Red Bull, Roadrunner, Robin Hood, Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, Scooby-Doo, Sherlock, Silverado (Chevrolet Silverado), Speed Racer, Solo cup, Spam, Spider-man, Sprite, Stetson, Styrofoam, Twizzlers, UNLV Runnin’ Rebels,

  Very Old Barton, Wheel of Fortune, Wile E. Coyote

  Cover design by Marie Romero

  Interior layout by Marie Romero

  ISBN 978-1-939392-80-0 (paperback)

  ISBN 978-1-939392-81-7 (e-book)

  Printed in the United States of America

  For Mom, who instilled my love of books and was the first to believe when I decided to write my own.

  For Dad, who taught me that with perseverance I could accomplish anything.

  THAT NIGHT

  I always assumed my final moments on this planet would be more dramatic—that I would at least go out fighting. I thought I would be filled with panic, desperately clawing for that last breath like they do in the movies. But all I really felt was an eerie calmness, a peacefulness that wrapped around my whole body like a warm blanket. It figures I’d find the emotion I’d been searching for just before my death.

  While I waited for angels to swoop down and retrieve my spirit (assuming I was heading north instead of south), I thought of a book I’d once read. It suggested that, when we die, we each experience our own kind of heaven with all five senses. I had made a mental list of my made-to-order heaven, and oddly, I was able to recall it as I lay there in a pool of warm blood.

  If the book was right, then I looked forward to hearing the thunder of horses’ hooves, the familiar scent of a worn leather saddle, and the sweet taste of honeysuckle. I welcomed the sight of my Prince Charming on his noble steed (for me, this was the Stetson Cowboy on a brown and white Paint). Instead, a more realistic vision filled my head. It was The Texas Bulletin newspaper with my name listed under the obituary section—no front-page story, no color print, no bold type. It read simply: River Jade Daniels, age 17, dies of self-inflicted gunshot wound, which was so far from the truth…

  1

  WORST DAY

  The worst day of my life started at four o’clock in the morning when the cell phone buzzed on my bedside table. Still half asleep, I fumbled to pick it up. Before I had a chance to put it to my ear, the deep voice on the other end started speaking.

  “I’ve been tryin’ to get a hold of you all night. Ranger’s colicking—you need to get over here.” The urgency in my best friend’s voice sent my heart into a hammering pace. “The vet was here late last night and gave him something,

  but…”

  I tore at the sheet tangled around me and had my feet on the floor in seconds. “Be right there.”

  Cursing myself for staying out so late with Logan and leaving my cell at home, I pulled on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, slipped on my boots, and stumbled down the creaky steps of our trailer. I climbed into Jack’s truck and pushed it to its limit all the way to Justice’s house. It normally took ten minutes to get there, but I made it in five.

  When I caught sight of Justice leading my big buckskin Quarter Horse under the security light in front of the barn, I threw the truck in park and ran to them. Ranger barely perked his ears to acknowledge me—not a good sign.

  “Here.” Justice thrust the lead rope at me. “I’m goin’ inside to call Dr. Goman again. Ranger wants to lie down, but you’ve gotta keep him movin’. You know if he gets down and rolls…”

  He’ll twist his gut and die. I blinked several times as I stared wide-eyed at Justice, then wrapped my sweaty palms around the rope.

  “I’ll be quick,” he promised and started for the old white farmhouse.

  “Justice,” I called after him, barely squeaking out his name.

  Turning back to me, his deep green eyes softened, and in three strides he closed the distance between us. Taking my face in his hands, he tilted my head up to focus on him. “We’re gonna be all right, Darlin’.”

  And with those six words, everything inside me calmed. Justice didn’t try to bullshit me and tell me Ranger would be all right. He told me what I needed to hear—the truth, same as he’d always done to help me through tough times. He said the same six words during my mom’s battle with cancer. The same six words on the day of her funeral.

  Maybe things didn’t turn out with a sparkly rainbow ending, but he was beside me through it all. His reassurance was what I needed then, and it’s what I needed now.

  He waited until I nodded, then took off running for the house.

  Directing my full attention to Ranger, I sucked in a controlled lungful of air and whispered, “Come on, boy, you can do it.” Slow and steady, I urged him to walk the length of the barn. When I attempted to circle back he hesitated, so I tugged harder at the lead rope. He gave me two more steps before his knees began to waver. I swatted him on the shoulder with the end of the rope to spur him on, but his knees buckled.

  “Please, Ranger,” I choked through the sand-like dryness invading my throat. Pulling with all my strength, I was barely conscious that Justice was shouting at me as he ran toward us. “Move out of the way!”

  Ranger swayed back and forth, but I stayed by his side. “No, I won’t let him go down!”

  “Dammit, River, move. He’s gonna fall on you!”

  Leaning all my weight against Ranger, I pushed my hands into his shoulder, determined to keep him moving. He took one more step, then staggered toward me. Justice shoved me away, barely clear of where Ranger thudded to his knees and then, with a guttural moan, slumped over on his side.

  I curled my fingers around his halter. “No…get up!”

  He looked up at me with his big dark eyes, then shifted upward onto his shoulder and made a weak attempt to rock back to gain some leverage.

  “Get up, please get up,” I begged.

  Kneeling on the opposite side of him, Justice tried pushing his rump to help him to his feet, bu
t it was no use. With a heavy sigh, my big, strong horse relaxed and let his neck and shoulder rest against the ground.

  I started for his halter again, and Justice reached across Ranger to put his hand on my wrist. “He doesn’t have anything left.”

  Dropping to my knees, I made a weak attempt at arguing. “No.”

  Justice squeezed my wrist tighter. “He’s too tired to fight. He doesn’t have the strength to roll over if he wanted to.”

  When Ranger heard the rumble of the vet’s truck, he raised his head up. Just as quickly, he laid it back down.

  “Please do something for him, Doc,” I begged, knowing full well my request was useless. Dr. Goman didn’t agree to anything, but for my sake, he began to check Ranger’s vitals.

  Tears streamed down my cheeks as I stroked his velvet coat. “I love you, Ranger,” I choked. “I’m so sorry I haven’t been around lately. So sorry.”

  Dr. Goman gave me a minute, then said, “River, honey, do you want to be here for this?”

  Justice met my eyes. “I’ll stay with him.”

  A million pinpricks jabbed at my heart. “I should be here. I want him to know…”

  Justice tipped his head and came to kneel beside me. Rubbing Ranger’s favorite spot under his jaw, I kept repeating, “I’m sorry, boy. I’m so sorry.”

  “He’s suffering. It’s the right thing to do,” Dr. Goman reassured me.

  The baseball-sized knot lodged in my throat wouldn’t allow me to speak.

  As if Ranger knew what waited ahead and welcomed it, he exhaled a deep, throaty groan—the sound of surrender. I buried my face in his big jaw and inhaled his scent one last time, then kissed him good-bye.

  When the death sentence was injected, it was quick and quiet. My whole body shook as I flung myself across Ranger’s shoulder and sobbed—deep, gut-wrenching sobs I didn’t know I was capable of. Placing a comforting hand on my back, Justice stayed beside me without saying a word—there were no words for this.

  When I finally turned to him, I noticed for the first time that his eyes were watery. This couldn’t be any easier for him; I’d had Ranger since he was a yearling, and Justice had always been around. He’d even taken care of my horse like his own for the past six years—ever since we lost our farm and had to move.

  The crunch of gravel beneath the heavy tires of the hauling truck made my stomach clench. I leaned across my beautiful horse again and whispered my final good-bye. Justice gave my hand a light squeeze to get my attention, then lifted his chin to let me know he was going to speak to the driver. When he returned, he scooped me up in his strong, safe arms, and I dissolved into him. His familiar, earthy scent and soft red and blue flannel shirt against my cheek gave me a shred of comfort, even though my heart reeled with pain I hadn’t experienced since my mom passed.

  Justice carried me to the porch behind the barn, sat me gently on a hay bale, then took a seat beside me. Together, in the early morning light, we watched his horse Daisy race back and forth along the fence line, nickering. Her golden coat gleamed, and her blonde mane and tail whipped wildly as she shook her head at the truck that was taking her best friend away.

  My heart ached for her—I would go crazy too if someone took Justice away. Leaning back against the barn with my head on his shoulder, the two of us stared out at the half-empty lot.

  Justice threaded his fingers through mine. “Remember the day Ranger was born?”

  A smile tugged at my lips. I could never forget it; Justice had just turned ten, and I wasn’t far behind. Our neighbor, Mr. Monroe, had hired us to clean stalls for the summer, and we’d been keeping a close watch on his pregnant mare, Belle. One night near her due date, we snuck out and met in our adjoining fields. Armed with sleeping bags and flashlights, we walked three miles to camp out in Mr. Monroe’s barn. One night turned into five, until it was finally time. It was our first time witnessing the birth of a foal, and it was magical.

  “From the moment he took his first steps, you could see how determined and spirited he was,” I half-laughed, “and those long legs were so out of proportion.”

  “You and him were two of a kind right from the start.” Justice winked when I fake-scowled at him. “It was love at first sight.”

  I did love Ranger at first sight, and I’d always loved Justice. In a far corner of my mind, I wondered if first love was the strongest kind—or at least the kind that lasted. I didn’t even like my boyfriend when I first met him, but my feelings changed quickly. It wasn’t the same kind of love I felt for Justice, but it was powerful. “Do you believe in it?” Justice’s eyebrows knit together, so I continued, “You know, love at first sight?”

  He stared at me a few seconds, his eyes crinkling around the edges, then leaned over and kissed the top of my head. “Yeah, I do.”

  A warm glow spread through my body even though I was well aware he wasn’t referring to me. He’d made it clear long ago that we were just friends and that’s all we’d ever be. And as long as he was part of my life, I’d take that.

  “You wore poor old Mr. Monroe down until he finally agreed to sell Ranger.” Justice rubbed the pad of his thumb across my hand. “He never had any intentions of letting his little buckskin colt go, but after a whole year of watching him follow you around like a baby duck, he figured he was too spoiled to be much use.”

  “He was wrong; Ranger was the best horse there ever was.”

  Justice nodded. “He turned out to be a better trail horse than any Mr. Monroe had trained.”

  “That’s what he told me, you know, that day we were riding near his place.” Tears stung my eyes, but I blinked them away. “It was the last time I rode Ranger.”

  Justice let go of my hand, wrapped his arm around my shoulder, and tucked me into him. And this time, I didn’t even try to stop the tears.

  2

  JEALOUS BOYFRIEND

  “Shit! What time is it?” I bolted upright after what seemed liked hours of tears and exhaustion, with Justice holding me through it all. I made a run for the truck and reached across the seat for my cell phone. Double shit. 8:35. Logan was supposed to pick me up for the Seniors’ Breakfast at his school. All the seniors who received football scholarships and a couple of college coaches were scheduled to be there, along with everybody in Winston that was anybody. I was only a measly junior and a nobody from Dahlia, but Logan insisted I be there to support him.

  Before the first ring ended, Logan growled into the phone, “Where the hell are you?”

  Uneasiness settled in my gut. A fight with Logan was the last thing I needed today. “I’m at Justice’s house. Ranger—”

  “Who’s Justice?”

  I struggled to keep my voice casual. “My friend. He boards my horse, remember? I told you about him.” Actually, I’d barely mentioned him to Logan because of his philosophy that girls and guys were never ‘just friends’. We’d even been to a couple of the same parties, but I’d managed to steer clear of Justice, knowing that Logan’s jealousy increased according to his alcohol intake.

  “I busted my ass to get to this damn trailer park to pick you up and you’re with some other guy?”

  My head began to throb. Every argument we’d ever had involved some other guy and Logan’s overactive imagination. “Logan, this was an emer—”

  “This is not cool, River. Do you have any idea how many times I tried calling you this morning?” I could tell by his last sentence that he was gritting his teeth.

  “I left my cell phone in the truck. I was in such a rush…” He had me so flustered, I almost forgot I was the one who should be upset. “Look, I’m sorry I forgot about the Seniors’ Breakfast, but Ranger…Ranger died.”

  “Oh…I’m sorry.” His tone dropped from anger to concern and somehow, I felt worse. “I was worried about you, that’s all. After you didn’t answer your cell, I tried calling the house and got a recording saying your home phone had been disconnected. Then I drove over to pick you up and bring you the dress my mom bought for you to wear t
onight. Your dad and sister aren’t here, either, so I’ve been worried.”

  “I’m sorry I had you worried.” Guilt began to tug at me until I processed his second-to-last sentence. “Did you just say your mom bought me a dress?”

  “You have to look right for your award ceremony tonight.” His tone lightened. “I’m not the only one being honored today—this morning with me, tonight with you, remember? This awards thing is a big deal for…you.”

  And a bigger deal for his parents, who happened to be my employers. They would be there to soak up all the recognition they could for my award. After all, if I hadn’t been using one of their expensive reining horses, I would have never been selected for the Horizon Award. I also wouldn’t be receiving the scholarship to go to a three-week training camp to study under one of the most recognized reining trainers in the world. Logan was right, tonight was a big deal—especially since I would be representing the Westfields’ horse farm. Couldn’t have me looking like a hobo. Nope, hobos would be bad for business.

  “Look, baby, I’m sorry about your horse. But I was really looking forward to you going with me this morning.” He paused. “At least I’ll get to be there for you tonight.”

  How did he do that? He pissed me off one minute and made me feel like a selfish, forgetful jerk the next. “No, wait, I have Jack’s truck. I’ll drive to your school and meet you—”

  “No. You can’t drive that…uh…”

  Oh, right. It would be an embarrassment for Logan Westfield’s girlfriend to be seen driving a rusted-out beater within a ten-mile radius of the most prestigious high school in northern Texas.

  “Listen, it’s cool if you don’t feel like going. Really.”

  I didn’t feel like going, but I didn’t want guilt added to the list of emotions I was experiencing on this fabulous day I was supposed to be having. “Can you wait a little longer?”

  He sighed. “I’ll wait here fifteen more minutes, then I have to go.”